The seat divorce hack that will save your marriage on a long flight
After 12 years together, it’s the everything without either of us having to sit opposite a relationship counsellor.
We bet on the single seat between us, and if it stays empty we both win.
Everyone assumes that two people who love each other must want to be side-by-side for every hour. In sickness and in health, in middle and in aisle. They decide choosing otherwise says something about our relationship, and wait for us to admit we would secretly rather sit together. We wouldn’t.
The flight is the one stretch of the trip where we both get precisely what we want. An aisle each, uninterrupted reading, nobody climbing over anybody and the rare joy of watching a stranger realise they are stuck in the middle thanks to my one steadfast rule.
We land in Dallas as happily married as when we left Melbourne.
Every time I explain this, someone says, “Why not book opposite aisles?” But that way each of us is gambling on our own neighbour, two separate rolls of the dice. The middle block is smarter. We bet on the single seat between us, and if it stays empty we both win. It stays empty about five per cent of the time. Terrible odds. Still better than a guaranteed middle seat.
We land in Dallas as happily married as when we left Melbourne. Sometimes happier, because neither of us has spent 17 hours trapped in the middle.
Marriage is about compromise. Unless it’s the middle seat.
